It is looming... the one day of the year during which you can express to your loved ones how much you do NOT in fact love them that much.
Yes, you have rightly guessed: Valentine's Day.
You probably guessed rightly not so much because you agree with me (in fact, you probably don't) but because, well, I used the word "love" twice in that one sentence.
But you should know by now that Valentine's Day isn't actually about love.
No, no, no.
Valentine's Day is about two things and two things only:
Indeed, Valentine's Day is a celebration of consumerism created by Hallmark... a brilliant marketing scheme that would increase profit.
Now see how businesses prosper around that time of year (along with Xmas and Easter and Hallowe'en).
Yes, you have rightly guessed: Valentine's Day.
You probably guessed rightly not so much because you agree with me (in fact, you probably don't) but because, well, I used the word "love" twice in that one sentence.
But you should know by now that Valentine's Day isn't actually about love.
No, no, no.
Valentine's Day is about two things and two things only:
1) Money
2) Hate
Indeed, Valentine's Day is a celebration of consumerism created by Hallmark... a brilliant marketing scheme that would increase profit.
Now see how businesses prosper around that time of year (along with Xmas and Easter and Hallowe'en).
Just witness the sickly "I Love You Beary Much" teddy bears, the nausea-inducing smell of red roses, the obese-rendering boxes of fat chocolates, all staring at you from shop windows.
Moreover, Valentine's Day is a concentration of all those things over 24 hours that highlights how LITTLE attention you pay (pun intended) to your lover throughout the rest of the year.
What Valentine's Day is telling you is that if you do not get your girlfriend that "I Love You Beary Much" teddy bear, then you are a total loser and your relationship doesn't deserve to survive and probably won't. And your girlfriend probably agrees with Mr. Valentine. So you better get off your backside and buy that stupid teddy if you don't want her to dump you.
Thus Valentine's Day is not about love. It only highlights two unflattering facets of mankind: Our love of materialism and our lack of regard of fellow humans.
Finally, Valentine's Day feeds off fear: Our fear of not being loved if we do not conform.
So... Be cool. Don't buy that teddy bear. Just get me the chocolates.
Moreover, Valentine's Day is a concentration of all those things over 24 hours that highlights how LITTLE attention you pay (pun intended) to your lover throughout the rest of the year.
What Valentine's Day is telling you is that if you do not get your girlfriend that "I Love You Beary Much" teddy bear, then you are a total loser and your relationship doesn't deserve to survive and probably won't. And your girlfriend probably agrees with Mr. Valentine. So you better get off your backside and buy that stupid teddy if you don't want her to dump you.
Thus Valentine's Day is not about love. It only highlights two unflattering facets of mankind: Our love of materialism and our lack of regard of fellow humans.
Finally, Valentine's Day feeds off fear: Our fear of not being loved if we do not conform.
So... Be cool. Don't buy that teddy bear. Just get me the chocolates.
Copyright © Caffeine Bubbles, 8 Feb 2010, Warwickshire, UK
3 comments:
Aha... well, no teddies for me then. Just give me a pair of huge diamond studded earrings! :-)
Yuk Yuk Yuk
How dare yoou mention the unmentionable
Happy V Day...
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